So, many of you know that I recently applied to Google's Engineering Practicum Internship. And I got an interview. Cool. And they sent my interview feedback to the hiring committee. Even cooler.

But then, today, about ten minutes before I had to give a speech in class, this: "Thank you so much for your interest in Google’s Engineering Practicum. Our hiring committee has carefully reviewed your application and interview feedback, and we are writing to inform you that unfortunately, after much deliberation, we are unable to move forward with your application at this time."

Well, this sucks.

I mean, I kind of suspected after my interviews that this was where I was headed. I will be the first to say that my interviews were not my best work and I could have done better. I was disappointed in myself afterwards, and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed in myself now.

But here's the thing - yeah, Google told me no internship this summer - but I'd argue that there was opportunity embedded in the application process that had nothing to do with actually getting the internship.

See, had you asked me at the start of September if I was applying to Google, the tech internship to rule all tech internships, I would have replied with a resounding, "no way!". If I was confident about anything computer science-related, it was that I, Blakeley Hoffman, sophomore at the University of South Carolina, was not "good enough" for Google, nor ever would be.

But, come the end of September,  I got an invitation from a recruiter to apply to the program. And all I could really think to myself was, me?!?!?! And, if there is one rule in the field of computer science, it is that if Google comes knocking on your door, you open it. So I applied, and we're back to  the top of this post - interview, hiring committee, and then, alas, no offer.

But there is one more thing I would like to add to that process - not only did I apply to Google after the invitation, I applied to other tech companies (note: if you're a tech company looking for interns reading this - hi, I'm looking for a summer internship) as well. Something I probably would not have done without the initial invitation from Google. I figured, well, if Google thinks that I, Blakeley Hoffman from the University of South Carolina, has a chance, well, maybe other tech companies will too.

So, Google told me I'm not quite ready for an internship with them this summer. But that's okay. I am okay. Just being considered told me something that I needed to hear: yes, I am able. Yes, I can.

So, thanks, Google. Until next year!


**Update: I am pretty sure I did well on my speech.